Medio bipolar

Que distinto este fin de semana del que recién pasó.

Hace una semana estaba fuera de Santiago, quedandome en una cabaña espectacular, con jacuzzi incluido, carrete non stop, en un ambiente ultra competitivo y superficial, lleno de pelambres y otros.

Este fin de semana vengo llegando del campo, en medio de la nada, acampando, sin ninguna comodidad, en un ambiente ultra ecológico (hasta los baños tenían sistema de reciclaje ultra rústico), haciendo cola para comer, compartiendo con cientos de personas llenas de buena energía, en un ambiente super espiritual.

Una cosa en común de ambos fines de semana..... estoy agotada, pero de este último siento que valío mucho más la pena.

Pero esta diferencia representa bastante bien como me siento, como que estoy constantemente en un lado y luego el otro, un momento tengo la película clarisima y al rato no sé donde estoy parada, quiero estar rodeada de gente y después que nadie me hable, de ser la ternura personificada a un ser insensible a todo, y así...... no sé como explicarlo.

Pero bueno, la idea de este blog era usar la música. Si mi don no es la habilidad para decir las cosas, voy a aprovecharme de quienes si pueden hacerlo, y en particular hay 2 canciones con las que me identifico casi en su totalidad. Total, para que usar solo una, si precisamente estoy diciendo que me siento doble.

En primer lugar voy a ir con Alanis Morissette (grande Alanis!) con "Everything", una gran canción con una letra maravillosa, y después voy a seguir con Meredith Brooks con "I´m a bitch".....pero hay que pescar la letra entera, no solo el título para entender porque la estoy poniendo, poh! :)

"I can be an asshole of the grandest kind
I can withhold like it's going out of style
I can be the moodiest baby and you've never met anyone
Who is as negative as I am sometimes
I am the wisest woman you've ever met.
I am the kindest soul with whom you've connected.
I have the bravest heart that you've ever seen
And you've never met anyone
Who's as positive as I am sometimes.

You see everything, you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can't relate
And you're still here

I blame everyone else, not my own partaking
My passive-aggressiveness can be devastating
I'm terrified and mistrusting
And you've never met anyone as,
As closed down as I am sometimes.
....
What I resist, persists, and speaks louder than I know
What I resist, you love, no matter how low or high I go

I'm the funniest woman that you've ever known
I'm the dullest woman that you've ever known
I'm the most gorgeous woman that you've ever known
And you've never met anyone
Who is as everything as I am sometimes ..."

 

 

 

 

 

"I hate the world today
You're so good to me.
I know but I can't change
Tried to tell you
But you look at me like maybe
I'm an angel underneath
Innocent and sweet

Yesterday I cried
Must have been relieved to see
The softer side
I can understand how you'd be so confused
I don't envy you
I'm a little bit of everything
All rolled into one

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way 


So take me as I am
This may mean
You'll have to be a stronger man
Rest assured that
When I start to make you nervous
And I'm going to extremes
Tomorrow I will change
And today won't mean a thing
 .....
Just when you think, you got me figured out
The season's already changing
I think it's cool, you do what you do
And don't try to save me
......

I'm a bitch, I'm a tease
I'm a goddess on my knees
When you hurt, when you suffer
I'm your angel undercover
I've been numb, I'm revived
Can't say I'm not alive
You know I wouldn't want it any other way "